“Disgusting sia!”

“I’m disgusted by amirah’s arms. I don’t want to be like that.”

Yes, the exact words my sisters said about my flabby arms.
DO I LOOK LIKE CARE?

NO. I DON’T.

I forgot how to breathe?

I keep having this moments recently where i’ll forget how to breathe. Like i have to constantly be aware that i am breathing, or else i’ll just stop. And i have to yawn and breathe in really deep to keep the oxygen running.

almost exactly like this.

Maybe i’m just full of anxiety right now.

sushi for dinner.

Wanted to make some for lunch tomorrow but work is cancelled so i had it for dinner instead. Made a few for sis for tomorrow as well, but she finished it all up just now. XD

egg-mayo miracle-whip sushi. Spread.

Roll it like i did with the swiss rolls. Hana banana taught me well. (But the first 2 were epic fails.)

Cut.

Done.

I thought i cooked only a little rice, but in the end it was a little too much, so these are still sitting in the fridge.

I need to start painting soon. What should i paint?

MK Ultra.

The wavelength gently grows
Coercive notions re-evolve
A universe is trapped inside a tear
It resonates the core,
creates unnatural laws
Replaces love and happiness with fear

How much deception can you take?
How many lies will you create?
How much longer until you break?
Your mind’s about to fall

And they are breaking through
And they are breaking through
They are breaking through
(We are losing control)
They are breaking through
They are breaking through
They are breaking through
Now we’re falling, We are losing control

Invisible to all, the mind becomes a wall
All of history deleted with one stroke

How much deception can you take?
How many lies will you create?
How much longer until you break?
Your mind’s about to fall

And they are breaking through
They are breaking through
They are breaking through
Now we’re falling
We are losing control

Our family sure loves milk.

i’ve just bought a 2 LITRE bottle of milk just 7 hours ago, and now it has finished. @_@

Now if only could secure a lifetime supply of meiji milk…

vegetarianism.

left-handedness.

another short random update.

So now that the Muse concert is over, i am still getting regular PMS-es (Post Muse Syndrome). This syndrome includes:
- refusing to listen to any other songs on my player except for muse (24/7)
- still headbanging to the songs everywhere i go (can get embarrassing in the train but then again, who cares?)
- refusing to eat any muscle painkillers even though my body was weak for the previous days (because it reminds me that i HAD been to the concert)
- watching as many videos of them as i could on you tube

What i would love to do is to have tea with them-and ask Matt how in the world did he get all the ideas for his songs? And thank all of them for the music of course, they did played a part  in how i turn out. I’m going to say this again. Watching them live IS A LIFE-CHANGING EVENT.

Okay, back to life. So now i am currently jobless freelancing once more, waiting for an opportunity to come. My plan B is to study by myself (just realized that i cannot afford to spend anymore, even if it’s 600-800 bucks) and working something non art related so that i can concentrate on my art fully. I don’t know if that make any sense to you. D:

Last few pictures taken in the office.
I am so going to miss the sunsets there. The clouds and sun rays seem to have its idea of perfect composition/values/colour . So many God rays.

Oh and before i forget!

Yep the ad is out! Right beside Basheer’s ad. And that is my handwriting too! Never in a million years i would have thought my horrible chicken scratch hand writing will be on an ad.

I saw an eagle when i was  at work (going to lunch) too. It was obviously not a pigeon, too bad it’s too far away to be taken with my crappy camera phone. It had brown feathers with speckled black dots. I thought it could have been an owl, but the beak shape is just too long and hooked to be an owl’s.

And finally a picture to annoy Mr Mamasa.

No, i will not explain what this is about. Good morning people! <3

Musing about Muse. BIG NIGHT OUT 2010!!!!!

MUSE-D.

(And finally, i am back! Regular blog posts coming your way. )

Warning: This is going to be an insanely long post. Sadly however, how much i say will not even remotely describe my experience i had watching Muse live. But i will try.

IT WAS DAMNNNN AWESOMEEE!!!!! I dare say that it is a life changing event. Thank you for the tickets Mr Mamasa, My first ever live concert and the best birthday present. Ever.

We started queuing up at 3 plus and there was already a line. Spend most of the time suntanning (no choice) and playing Backgammon. Alina and Rasis joined in halfway and we got to talk to them. When 7pm strikes, i was so psyched!

First Saosin played. I couldn’t say that much since i never heard any of their songs. My conclusion was : nothing special. The thing i hated however is how the (probably Saosin hardcore fan) crowd were pushing and shoving like crazy. You see someone fall, pick the person up, don’t continue shoving.  Mr Mamasa and i fell twice when Saosin played (and thankfully no more later). The first fall was terrible,  people at the side of me fell and i lost my balance – so did Mr Mamasa – and we both fell. He crushed someone and a few people crushed on my leg and in an awkward postition. Luckily someone pulled me up and later pulled him as well (I wasn’t strong enough @_@).

At that moment in time i was grateful that i am:

- not skinny
- rugged
- averaged height (not short)
- currently healthy

Two girls in front of me left the minute the first song Saosin played ends. I saw a few more pulling out and getting out around me. That was how crazy it was. If i had an  intense asthma attack right there and then, i think i would have probably died fainted! Was really out of breath (even Mr Mamasa was!), it was fucking insane, THE ENERGY!

Tim from Rise Against

Rise Against was much better though, Tim seems like a humble fella -giving the props up to Saosin and Muse. I’m glad that they slowed down and played Hero of War: -

It’s such a meaningful song. Being all PETA supporters and vegetarians/vegans, i totally respect the band in spreading the message like this:-

I screamed like crazy when they played that song as the last song! Such a great band, please come again to Singapore for a full blown concert!

And finally Muse. Their mission was really to entertain, not just play for us. The laser effects, the animation going on the screens the balloons, the lights! Everything was mind blowing. Everything was in sync, every single song, special. It was crazy, i didn’t know where i got all the energy to jump and jump and scream even when i only slept an hour the night before.
This was the setlist:-

1. Uprising
2. Supermassive Black Hole
3. Map of the Problematique
4. Resistance
5. Interlude
6. Hysteria
7. Stockholm Syndrome + War Within a Breath Riff
8. Nishe
9. United States Of Eurasia
10. Sunburn
11. Helsinki Jam 
12. Undisclosed Desires 
13. MK Ultra
14. Starlight
15. Time Is Running Out
16. Unnatural Selection
    Encore:
17. Exogenesis: Symphony, Part 1: Overture
18. Plug In Baby
19. Knights of Cydonia

    

Everything was so real, IT’S SURREAL. There Matt was right in front of me, playing the guitar (changing a different one for every single song) and singing, reaching every god damn high note i may add. He is really one of a kind, i really hope that he can keep up the act and won’t lose his great singing voice as he gets older. I will still see them perform if they are 60! As long as they have the energy to. And speaking of energy, Dom has endless energy! He was trashing the drums up till the very last song. No wonder he’s so skinny. Let’s not forget Chris, the amazing bassist and backup singer. He keeps head banging and plays without looking. And we are not talking about 3 chord songs here, his fingers are flowing through the frets like water. Strong and silent type. And fucking talented.

(Sorry Dom, this is the only non-blur pic we had of you. @_@)

I think most of us sang every single word till we went out of breath/lost our voices.

Love it when everyone went “HEY! HEY! HEY! HEY!” when they opened with Uprising. “SO COME ON!!!!!”
“They will not force us!!!
They will stop degrading us!!!
They will not control us!!!!
We will be victorious!!!”
(Take that, government!)
The first 30 seconds of Supermassive black hole was crazy – and of course audience screaming “SUPERMASSIVE BLACK HOLLLLEEEEEEEEE!”
“IT COULD BE WRONG, COULD BE WRONG!!” (Resistance)
Everybody went CRAZY when Hysteria came out. Like
“AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!” something like that.
“EURASIA! SIA! SIA! SIA!” ‘Nuff said. Great piano playing, Matt. (Note to self – get a Kawai brand if i ever save enough for a piano.)
Playing Sunburn was a nice surprise.
The laser things were really nice when Undisclosed Desires were played.
MK Ultra, what can i say? THEY ARE TALKING ABOUT MK ULTRA!!!

Such strong lyrics.
“How much deception can you take?
How many lies will you create?
How much longer until you break?
Your mind’s about to fall…”
Clapped along to Starlight’s beat…
Jumped and jumped for Time is Running Out and Unnatural Selection!

They played an encore of Exogenesis Part 1 (please play part 2 when you come back!), Plug in Baby – and finally what Mr Mamasa’s been waiting for -Knights of Cydonia. Great end.

The big balloon filled with confetti popped right on top of me and the balloon rubber fell into my hands. I decided to keep it.

Special thanks to
the guys who pulled me up when Mr Mamasa and i fell,
the girl that held my hand for a while when jumping so that we both don’t fall,
the guy who asked “Are you okay?” when i was bending down a while (due to backache and the female cramps)
the guys that passed us the cup of water for a sip before we faint from exhaustion
and of course Mr Mamasa who hugged and protected me from the human tide and blowing on my face when there was no air. I don’t think i could have survived it without you.

And so let’s get back to why this post is so long. Muse has always been my muse inspiration. Their songs keep me going when i have a deadline going on and when i am feeling depressed. They talk about how we should open our eyes to what the government/media is doing to us (Uprising, Take a Bow, MK Ultra etc.) and more importantly my whole attitude towards life (Invincible, Butterflies and Hurricanes etc.) Keeps me strong. So i have to say thank you guys. Thank you Matt, Chris and Dom for your music.

You guys are the best.

Pastamania, you broke my heart.

You have just taken out my two favorite dishes from your restaurant – Spicy Portobello and Tri-shrooms Pizza. I don’t think I’m ever going back again.

Sounds oh-so-familiar.

I love V for Vendetta. Whatever V said, i feel that he is describing exactly what is happening here.

::Televised Speech::

Good evening, London. Allow me first to apologize for this interruption. I do, like many of you, appreciate the comforts of every day routine- the security of the familiar, the tranquility of repetition. I enjoy them as much as any bloke. But in the spirit of commemoration, thereby those important events of the past usually associated with someone’s death or the end of some awful bloody struggle, a celebration of a nice holiday, I thought we could mark this November the 5th, a day that is sadly no longer remembered, by taking some time out of our daily lives to sit down and have a little chat. There are of course those who do not want us to speak. I suspect even now, orders are being shouted into telephones, and men with guns will soon be on their way. Why? Because while the truncheon may be used in lieu of conversation, words will always retain their power. Words offer the means to meaning, and for those who will listen, the enunciation of truth. And the truth is, there is something terribly wrong with this country, isn’t there? Cruelty and injustice, intolerance and oppression. And where once you had the freedom to object, to think and speak as you saw fit, you now have censors and systems of surveillance coercing your conformity and soliciting your submission. How did this happen? Who’s to blame? Well certainly there are those more responsible than others, and they will be held accountable, but again truth be told, if you’re looking for the guilty, you need only look into a mirror. I know why you did it. I know you were afraid. Who wouldn’t be? War, terror, disease. There were a myriad of problems which conspired to corrupt your reason and rob you of your common sense. Fear got the best of you, and in your panic you turned to the now high chancellor, Adam Sutler. He promised you order, he promised you peace, and all he demanded in return was your silent, obedient consent. Last night I sought to end that silence. Last night I destroyed the Old Bailey, to remind this country of what it has forgotten. More than four hundred years ago a great citizen wished to embed the fifth of November forever in our memory. His hope was to remind the world that fairness, justice, and freedom are more than words, they are perspectives. So if you’ve seen nothing, if the crimes of this government remain unknown to you then I would suggest you allow the fifth of November to pass unmarked. But if you see what I see, if you feel as I feel, and if you would seek as I seek, then I ask you to stand beside me one year from tonight, outside the gates of Parliament, and together we shall give them a fifth of November that shall never, ever be forgot.

Thank you V. Words have never been said clearer.

(From a star wars movie review, – George Lucas)
“You start out in democracy, and democracy turns into a dictatorship, and then the rebels make it back into democracy.”
okay too much quotes from movies.

Use the force!
It’s the new year and it’s time for change.

Lee Kuan Yew, it’s time YOU step down.

Sorry, not much update on my personal life but right now, i have to talk about this. It has made my blood boil.

For those who have not heard - THE LINK IS RIGHT HERE.

“The first was the insinuation that the Malays are self-centred and selfish. Mr Lee had said, “Well, we make them say the national pledge and sing the national anthem but suppose we have a famine, will your Malay neighbour give you the last few grains of rice or will she share it with her family or fellow Muslim or vice versa?”

Why won’t the Malay share his food, either with his neighbour or with a fellow Muslim, during a famine? Does Mr Lee have a special insight as to how Malays will behave in a crisis? “

If you did not believe this, click here for the whole transcript of the interview he did with National Geographic.

After reading that i feel so angry and ashamed at the same time. HOW COULD HE SAY SOMETHING LIKE THAT????!!
I don’t want to get all too religious here, but you don’t need to be pious to know these things. Read on.

Mr Lee:  “It’s worked. And so we have a more homogenous and more homogenous in the sense that they haven’t changed their religions, the Malays are still Muslims and they go to the mosques every Friday and they’ve slightly different habits. The influence from the Middle East has made them have head-dresses for no rhyme or reason.”

Sir, you have just stepped out of line for saying that. You, by now, should know that it is part of OUR religion to wear modestly. It is not an influence. IT IS A RELIGION.  You don’t have to be pious to know that. If you have been enforcing multiracial and multi-religious culture, you should already know.

A text from an article.
“Muslim women wear the head-covering (hijab) in fulfillment of God’s decree to dress modestly. From a practical standpoint, it serves to identify one as attempting to follow God in daily life and, therefore, protects women from unwanted advances from men. This type of modest dress has been worn by righteous women throughout history. Prominent examples are traditional Catholic Nuns, Mother Teresa and the Virgin Mary, mother of Jesus.“

Where are you MUIS? Where are you Muslim PAP leaders? WHY ARE YOU NOT RIGHTING HIS WRONGS??!!

We already couldn’t count on this guy.
“Encik Othman Wok, the then minister-in-charge of Muslim affairs had publicly said that he doubted there is such a thing as the hereafter (life after death), which is one of the pillars of the Islamic faith.“

Stop taking every word the government says for granted. You have a brain. Think, and question if what he is saying is right.
Stop fearing, people.

Just carry on.

Time goes by
But you can’t rest
Too many things
And you’re obsessed
Trying to find
Some sense to it all

No-one knows what you’ve been through
Like no-one cares
But it’s not true
Turn the pages
And make a fresh start

When you are low
You should know
You are not the only lonely soul
And you will find
The strength inside
There is no more need to hide

Just carry on
Fullfill your dreams
Don’t let them try to pull you down
So carry on
Don’t give up
March on till the end
The road is long but you’ll reach the final bend

Just carry on people.

card interval.

After buying 4 card holders, i still have a whole bunch more cards to sort out. -_-

I probably need at least 3 more holders. Damn, why are card holders so expensive? @_@

Oh and by the way, THIS-

-IS ROGUE. Not the weak sauce version you saw in the X-men film. That is all.

I need to go rest my back before it gets even more crooked.

Honeybee.

I am a honey bee,
shunned off from the colony
and they won’t let me in

So I left the hive,
They took away all my stripes
and broke off both my wings

So I’ll find another tree
and make the wind my friend
I’ll just sing with the birds
They’ll tell me secrets of the world

But my other honey bee
Stuck where he doesn’t wanna be
But my darling, honey bee
I’ll come save you
Even if it means I’d have to face the queen

So I’ll come prepared,
My new friends say they would help me
get my loved one back
They say it isn’t right,
To be self control of your mind
but I choose not to believe that

So we’ll meet in the darkness of the night,
and I promised I will be there all time
We’ll be guided by my new friends, the butterflies,
bring us back to our own little hive

Oh my other honey bee,
No longer stuck where he doesn’t want to be
Oh my darling, honey bee,
I have saved you
And now that you’re with me,
we can make our own honey

Such a beautiful song.

LOOK WHAT CAME IN THE MAIL TODAY!

I know i’m supposed to be away, but i’m just too excited.

I sent an email to them last year, and i didn’t expect to win the star letter – MEANING I WILL GET A WHOLE YEAR OF FREE IMAGINEFX. I guess it pays to tell the truth. Ironically, i missed issue #44, when my letter was published. That’s why i was shocked when i got the email. After waiting patiently, (:P) I GOT IT.
It’s the subscribed version as well, so there’s no text at the front.
I’m gonna read it now. Tata!

i cannot stay awake.

meh.

corsets.

I like corsets but my body is too man-ish to pull them off.

What’s more they all cost less than 30 bucks. (i bought 2 a while back and they just came.)
Gotta love online shopping. The goods usually come to me when i am dead broke, so it’s a cheer-upper.
Great deal i must say.

i love what i do.

i has cut my nails. It gets in between me and my wacom.

i am utterly exhausted.